lazy sunday 18th march

i'm having a lazy sunday - means nothing much ever happened today. i'm still thinking a little about the church and stuff. i hope pastors will stop using big words. just break down the words and just say, in simple terms what things really mean. using big words sounds cool, but it might actually be empty too! for example, what does 'revelation of the cross' really mean? a simpler choice of words would be 'the things revealed at the cross' but even so, what does it really mean? if it means say, the work of Jesus at the cross, then, why not just say so? its cool to use big words if you want people to remember it easier. like how the points of a sermon always start with the same letter, but it gets to the point when its simply empty. like weasel words. why noy speak plainly?

anyway, still can't get over the fact that parents are still so restricting. still loving them, and i know they love me lots, but it gets to the point when its near-suffocating. like, being summoned home and things like that. it'll be hard when i tell them i'm christian, but i guess it can't be any easier. otherwise, my life is really fine.

does the church have a place for thinking people? i don't think so. at the way things are going, seems that they don't like nosey-pokers who ask awkward questions about the nature of religion. they don't like people who ask tough theological-philosophical questions which they can't answer. and because they can't answer, they don't want to be asked in the first place.

'educated beyond intelligence' is a veiled insult, come to think of it. all the things mentioned about faith and love and all that, its still the same old things, though everytime they attempt to repackage it different ways. the words of me good friend christian call out to me. shallow christians, shallow songs. mtv-like packaging. errgh. no flashing lights, no cool music. just a simplicity of worship. hahaha. oh well. doesn't matter....

and love? love for peoples? oh please... i've been so been through that. like the thousands who perish from famine, AIDS? or the homeless and the poor in singapore? and whats this about warrior/kingdom of light? and 'the marketplace'? who remembers the warrior/kingdom of light 5 years from now? its good to have messages, but to have them one year and throw them away the next... strategy and tactics... family, corporation, military?

sometimes these messages make people tired. at least i'm tired. at the end of it, the question is still asked, 'whats all these about?' if you can't answer... then things would have been in vain...