musings on a justification 26th jan 2007

i'm thinking of something which shows the passion that i have for reading up on stuff esoteric, abstract. for reading up on stuff that few others will bother to read, for having an attitude of life that few others have.

why do i read?
i can't say i can fully answer myself. like a drive, an impulse that keeps me going on and on, hardly ceasing, the urge to just know more. but for what? i don't know where these readings will take me. its not simply so that i can appear smart in front of others - that was never the point. i still can't answer myself. but i was never totally 'knowledge for its own sake'. ultimately, i want to be able to do something with the things that i have inside my head, exactly what i still don't know. to change the world? something like that - to do some good - to inform people, to ask them to do the right things. i want to have arguments prepared, so that when it comes to showdowns, i know that i have the arsenal of ideas...

truth for its own sake? something like that, to show people the gospel of truth, so that they know what they should do...